I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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