We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize