K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Do vagina's smell?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize