So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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