do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
