Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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