Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Your cock deserves a montage
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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