Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
