THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
