i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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