please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
