why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
