Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
