I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize