Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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