TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize