i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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