Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
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