So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
