I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
