So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
