I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize