i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
