Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
