She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
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