She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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