Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
