He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
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