I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
