How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
