If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
