so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
