Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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