Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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