GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
