It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Randomize