People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
whose parrot is this?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
