In the future we'll all be gay
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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