i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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