you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize