Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
