Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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