Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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