I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
