so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
