Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize