Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
