Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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