barbara walters just said penis...
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
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