I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
