you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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