420 ftw
North Korea, Best Korea!
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
