In the future we'll all be gay
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
