fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Randomize
